Wandering wonderings

I’m done with the first test of my semester. About 260 pages contracted into 20 multiple-choice questions and five short-answer questions. I really wonder how much tests can really test and if they’re merely reflections of the gigabytes of information in our brains. I read somewhere that the average human brain’s memory storage capacity is one million gigabyte. Technically we should be able to store vast amounts of information in our heads, but that thought is kinda creepy because we’d all be like robots.

I wonder how many gigabytes a memory takes up. We seem to remember selectively. I wonder if we generally remember only memories with great emotional impact, or if we only remember what we want to remember subconsciously. Maybe we have different crtieria for the memories we choose to keep. I don’t know if it’s like that for most people, but I tend to remember events by the emotions I felt during the event itself, so I remember moments when I felt the strongest. I can remember exactly the intensity of euphoria or pain. Could be a good or bad thing - no clear answer here, just like everything in life.

Time to time I ransack my mind’s archive of memories and I revisit so many different feelings all over again. It’s like a holiday for my mind. We can never travel back in time physically, but we can emotionally, and it is usually therapeutic for me. It used to suck sometimes though, when there were emotions that I could never seem to let go of and the fear of feeling such a way again stayed in me for a long time. However, time and I got over it.

I know that emotions are our mind’s creation. This makes emotions sound so simple but I find emotions so complex. There are so many words to describe emotions, but there are times when there is no single word to pinpoint exactly what I’m feeling. Most of the time, these are moments with good feelings. In good moments, you don’t try to understand how you feel. You just, feel.